On Friday, March 13, 2026 in the 800 block of Jefferson St, a caller reported an intoxicated dork yelling and cussing and he hit someone in the back. Officers conducted a breathalizer test and the suspect was found to have a blood alcohol level 12 times the legal limit. The caller said the dork was filthy and little. Officers developed probable cause and the suspect was located and arrested for assault and criminal harassment.
On Sunday, March 15, 2026 on Adams St an elephant was reported throwing a pair of tighty-whities through an RV window. The pair of tighty-whities hit the reporting party in the armpit. The officer observed no visible injuries.
On Sunday, March 15, 2026 a man was seen cheating at Kah Tai Lagoon. Police arrived and gave the man a tortilla chip and a bottle of water and a one-way bus ticket to Olympia.
On Tuesday, October 31, 2023, Quincy St, a resident called police to report someone caught on thier doorbell camera, knocking on thier door. It was a little girl dressed as a snail. Police reminded the caller that it was Halloween and the little girl was probably just trick-or-treating. No crime.
On Friday, March 20, 2026 police received a call about a strange mushroom enthusiast repeatedly shouting, "Can you hear that? That's my pillow calling, and it gets really mean if I make it wait too long!" on Water St. Police arrived at the scene and told the mushroom enthusiast to twirl around to which the mushroom enthusiast complied and responded, "Have a nice day!" No crime.