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Dictatorship 101

By: Helen A. Handbasket
July 27, 2018

Have you always dreamed of being a dictator? Can you see yourself as a strongman in a banana republic? Does the word "despot" make your heart swell? If you said yes, then you need to study the following behaviors as taught in the How to Be a Dictator class at Trump University.

  1. Concoct your own facts and call them "alternative facts".
  2. Lie and repeat your lies until they are believed.
  3. Call the free press the “enemy of the people".
  4. Undermine trust in government institutions.
  5. Find ways to punish your critics.
  6. Use your position to line your own pockets.
  7. Claim that laws don't apply to you.
  8. Put together a loyal group of sycophants to support you.
  9. Paint a gloomy picture of the future and claim that only you can fix it.

Study hard and maybe one day, you too, will have a snappy nickname like “IL Duce".

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